Let me say from the onset, you have to WANT to nip cheating behavior in the bud. If a partner or a mate wants to cheat, they are going to cheat. This advice is for those who are still interested in working towards a healthy happy relationship.

One thing is for certain; relationships can be quite complicated. Take the subject of cheating. People have different views on what is cheating and what it is not cheating. Some may ask, is this innocent flirtation with a person I work with infidelity? Does it really count unless I am married? How can I tell if the line is really being crossed? Is there really a line at all?

Some notions of cheating and infidelity differ according to which part of the country you live in, different countries and different cultures. So what is up?

Well first off, there is a line to cross and there are ways to tell if it is being crossed. Regardless of region, country or residency, I think there are some universal guidelines that we can pretty much agree on.

Guideline #1

If you or your partner engages in a behavior or relates to anther person in a way that makes either party uncomfortable, you are most likely on the edge of complicating your relationship. If your continuing idle chitchat with your ex is problematic for your current partner, don’t sweep it under the rug – deal with it.

Guideline #2

If you or your partner has affection for someone outside your relationship that you invest a lot of thought into, you are in a danger zone. Some consider thinking hot or erotic thoughts of a coworker or your partner’s friend is ok. Usually it is not. You life is going to travel in the direction of your dominant thought. If you are having fun fantasizing about Judy or Jim, redirect your thoughts INSIDE your own relationship.

Guideline #3

If you or your partner think it is OK to flirt but not to touch. You are flirting with disaster if you think you can harmlessly flirt and it is ok. If you are married or in a committed relationship, this behavior is unacceptable. Would it be okay with you if the situation was reversed? I think not! The reason the flirtation is going on in the first may be something lacking between the two of you that can be worked on before the flirtation goes too far.

In any of the scenarios above, if you are getting sexual or emotional satisfaction outside of your relationship, you have trouble on your hands.