Every day, society and even our closest people challenge our psyche by dozens of irritants: lousy weather, unfulfilled obligations, difficulties at work and in personal life. If ordinary people have learned to cope with them, angry heroes find it difficult to control their emotions. This is partly to blame for high impulsivity, undeveloped empathy, and a low tolerance for frustration. It is challenging to cope with yourself in an extreme situation with such a set, be polite in a Ukrainian girls chat, and show patience towards people you love. How can you learn to manage the anger that destroys relationships and negatively affects your health? (Image Credits: Trinity/Pexels)
1. Acknowledge the problem
You will not be able to take control of the situation as long as you deny your anger and run away from responsibility: “she made me do this,” “it was his fault,” “I just have such a character.” Put aside the excuses. The habit of reacting to everything with irritation and anger is your real flaw. When you recognize this, the transformation process will go faster.
2. Find the real reason for the anger
Often, anger is a false emotion, which we use to mask our “shameful” feelings. Think about what is behind your anger — fear, anxiety, guilt, dissatisfaction, or self-doubt? Why do you prevent yourself from expressing real emotions? What are you running away from? What do you want to achieve? Are you sad because Ukrainian brides do not text you back or because you can’t understand how to attract their attention?
3. Stop overthinking
Look at the situation objectively: did the person want to offend you, or did you come up with everything yourself and were offended, rushing to conclusions? Do not build expectations, do not decide everything for others, and then you will have fewer reasons for frustration.
4. Share your emotions
Anger is a complex of negative experiences that a person has been keeping inside for too long. Not to take the situation to an extreme, stop accumulating negative emotions — talk about what makes you angry on the spot, explain what offends you, or not suit you. This step will help you solve the problem early on, allowing others to understand yourself better.
5. Step into the victim’s shoes
When we are angry, it isn’t easy to reason and think of others’ feelings. Try to look at the situation through the eyes of your partner. Why did the person act this way? Did they want to harm you, or did he have his reasons? Think about how your opponent feels and how they explain their point of view. This will calm your ardor a little.
6. Take responsibility for your feelings
Be honest: you can’t manage your anger, or don’t want to? Expecting others to accept you for who you are is an infantile position. Stop lashing out at loved ones, track anger at the moment of inception to prevent it in time. You are the master of your feelings, not they control you.